To celebrate Burns Day and give a real Scottish feel I am posting a few Scottish jokes I received from Scottish friends. I hope you enjoy the Scottish humour.

The Canny Scot

At an auction in Glasgow a wealthy Englishman announced he had lost his wallet containing £20,000 and would give a reward of £500 to the person who found it.

From the back of the hall a Scottish voice shouted, ‘I’ll give £550.’

Scottish Church Announcement

The following was seen on a poster outside a Church in Ayr: DRINK IS YOUR ENEMY.

Next to this was another poster which said: LOVE YOUR ENEMY.

Thoughtful Scottish husband

A Scotsman who was heading out to the pub. He turned to his wee wife before leaving and said, “Darlin’, put your hat and coat on.”

She replied, ‘Och that’s nice, are you taking me to the pub?’

‘Nay, just switching the central heating off whilst I’m oot.’

Let me know if you have any Scottish jokes in the comments below and happy Burns Day to any Scotsmen reading this!

Dan the man.

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